When Life Gives You Criticism…

What does it feel like to work with others and not take their feedback personally? For so long, I’ve found it difficult to separate myself from what I do. Quite often I would take a person’s feedback for anything I produce, as a criticism of me, Aida. 

I’d follow up on this perceived criticism with self-critique, laying into myself for not doing things right the first time. It’s quite exhaustive.

Yesterday, I delivered a business proposal for a client in an industry I’m still learning about. Even with the doubts I had, I persisted to finish the proposal and submit it. I was happy with what I had produced because I knew I genuinely did the best with what I knew.

Shortly after submitting, I received many notes regarding the proposal. For an instant, I felt myself reeling towards a voice in my head that began criticizing myself. I couldn’t separate my work from me. However, because I had other tasks to work on, I knew how much time I’d waste by dwelling on this matter. And so, I decided to not make it a matter to dwell on.

I listened intently to the feedback I received, made the modifications necessary, and reworked the entire proposal. It wasn’t a peachy or smooth process because I definitely went in and out of frustration. And when my self-critiquing thoughts became too much, I took a break and spent 10 mins meditating.

This takes time. A growing process of unlearning. However, I’ve seen a glimpse of my evolution, so I know it’s possible.