Own Your Doubts

Lately, I’ve been taking on new contract jobs that have been pushing me outside of my comfort zone. A few months back, if you told me I’d be getting these writing jobs, I would only believe you if you said I finished some sort of online course on the subject. But even then, I still wouldn’t fully believe that I was actually going after such jobs.  

Some may recognize this as, “Imposter Syndrome,” but for me, it’s been my default way of thinking. I’ve said this before, but what’s shifted the confidence in my skillset has come from this daily practice of writing. More specifically, in the practice of letting go of expectations, accepting what comes naturally, and realizing the value within that.

When I apply for jobs, I’m confident, driven, and focused. Once I land the contract, I’ll pause and say to myself, “Whoa, who do you think you are to finesse a gig like this?” It won’t be in a negative tone but more like a moment of disbelief. Think Quinta B, “Oh, he got money.”

What I’ve been noticing is how I’ll feel super confident one moment, and then terrified the next. But that’s normal. After sharing these thoughts with my mom, she gave me her usual dose of wisdom.

“Have the awareness to recognize moments of doubt, don’t ignore them, but be curious.” She went on to remind me of the importance in writing down your wins each day. Reflecting on what you’ve accomplished and what you’re most proud of. Count your wins until they outweigh your doubts.